ducing "therapists." Through the "Personals" ad he hoped to meet someone decent, attractive, "jam" looking and perfect. Afraid to go near a bar, he snubbed all the gay people at his office. He talked about it only to me and to one of his sisters. Several very nice guys answered his ad (he nearly flipped over one), but Chad was too frozen up to respond. A couple of them gave him a rough time. He might have been better off if there'd been a long interval of correspondence before each initial meeting (that sometimes thaws the icebergs), but his example proves that placing or answering such an ad is only the first step. You must be willing and able to follow up. Chad was too desperately sick to take the friendship he wanted.

Meeting compatible people, whether for life-partnership, for friendship, or merely for sex, is one of the hardest problems for some homosexuals. A Pen Pal club is the long way around if one is just looking for sex, and not necessarily the best method for finding life-partners, but is a very fine source of friendships.

We have different ways of trying to put ourselves across. Some make the best first impression face-to-face. Others do much better on paper. Who is to say that the personality expressed in a letter is a false image and that only a face-to-face meeting can tell you what a person is really like? That can tell you what they look like (so can a photo), but physical beauty sometimes masks a foolish or vicious soul, while the personality expressed in letters is generally more honest, and certainly more lasting.

For the uncertain homosexual, all ways of meeting people contain elements of risk. There is less risk in Pen Pals than in other avenues of approach. Of course, the individual who can't make friends will have difficulty whatever his approach. The man who is a natural sucker for hus-

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tlers can expect trouble whether by mail, in bars or church, or on the street. The perfectionist who sets impossible standards for other people will be disappointed in his friends however he finds them. A Pen Pal club is a good way to find friends, but is no solution to deep personality problems of those for whom friendship is impossible even though it is their chief desire.

The simple fact remains that many sane and reasonable people can make friends better by mail than by meeting right off in person, whether due to geographical isolation, shyness, tight apron strings, or the mere ability to express themselves best in writing. Whether or not ONE attempts to provide some safe Pen Pal service for these people, someone will, safe

or not.

Most European homophile groups place chief emphasis on this. Many American magazines unwittingly provide such services for homosexualsbut with heavy risks for the users. A number of inexperienced persons around the country, not knowing the serious legal issues involved, and without any guarantee of proper safeguards, are starting such clubs. If such a thing is to be done, it had best be done responsibly. Proper supervision of such contacts is needed to prevent the abuses we hear so much about.

I object to the assumption that any homophile who writes to or otherwise contacts a person of his sex has an act of sodomy or such in mind. I am sexually attracted to other males (but hardly to all) and I have nothing against sex acts. But I am also drawn to men for friendship, companionship, conversation, by admiration, sympathy and the need for fulfillment.

Why should it be improper for isolated or lonely homosexuals to advertise their desire to write to or meet

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